Top Ten Gentlemanly Actions that Need to Make a Comeback
So lately I have been really interested in the concept of chivalry, etiquette, and the way ladies and gentlemen should present themselves. In today's society we throw around the words lady and gentleman far too easily they are not interchangeable terms with the words woman and man, because the meaning is different. A lady or a gentleman acts accordingly, presenting themselves in a kind and respectful manner in public and private. A man or a woman does not have to qualify with these standards. As you all know by now I am not very good at dating or any of that sort of thing, but I believe it is because I have higher standards than a mindless hookup entails. I believe that a man should court a woman, get to know her, attempt to impress her, make an effort. This just doesn't happen now a days. So here is my list of amazingly wonderful actions executed by a proper gentleman that I think should make a comeback in today's society.
Pulling Out a Chair for A Lady to Sit Down
This is still observed by some men, but if it made a full force comeback I would not be disappointed This just shows that you care for her and wish to help so she doesn't have to scoot her chair and make a scene in a restaurant or at an event.
PRO TIP: Stand when the lady stands. If she gets up to powder her nose or excuses herself from the table for any reason, you should stand and then be seated when she leaves. Upon her return you should stand and accompany her to her seat again.
Walking on the Side Closest to the Street
This is super attractive to me, even though it usually goes unnoticed. By walking closest to the street you are shielding her from possible danger from cars and placing yourself in between her and any water that may splash up from passing cars. Keeping your lady safe and clean should always be a top priority.
Asking in Advance to Take Her Out on a Proper Date
My grandmother had a rule when she was younger that if a boy didn't ask her out by Tuesday for a Friday date she wouldn't go out with him until the following week. Giving her three days notice is a good rule of thumb, I think. Also have a plan for the date. Don't just say dinner and a movie and have no idea what movies are playing at what times or where to take her for dinner. You have three whole days (since you asked her in a respectable time frame) to find a restaurant and movie.
*PRO TIP - Make reservations even if it's just at Olive Garden. It shows you thought about things in advance and are willing to lead.
*ADVANCED PRO TIP - a date can be something other dinner and a movie. Some examples are ice skating (seasonal), a carnival, dessert and a long drive, a picnic by a lake. Make it memorable.
*SUPER ADVANCED PRO TIP - Take her dancing. Please of please do this! Real dancing too, not that bumping and grinding stuff that all the kids these days are into. Real, honest to God, dancing. Being able to dance with someone is so romantic and intimate, and even if you aren't good if the two of you can have a laugh about it the whole situation is very endearing. Plus, she will then tell all her friends that you took her out dancing, which just sounds super gentlemanly and suave.
Walk Two Steps Down on the Stairs
Ascending and descending stairs can be tricky in heels or a long dress so by walking a few steps down from her you are able to assist her of she stumbles or falls. Some of you are probably thinking "why two steps that's so specific?" Two steps gives her enough space so she doesn't t feel like you are breathing down her neck, but it is close enough that you can't a.) assist her if a malfunction in balance befalls her b.) see up her skirt (because that is super skeezy).
Refrain from Profanity
This one can be a bit harder to abide by since it's hard to change patterns of speech. However, it is highly disorienting when your date is cursing like a sailor when you are out to dinner. Respect her enough to use proper language. My mother has a rule for our house that I try to still apply in my daily life, "profanity is for emphasis and comedy." This basically means if the word will enhance the joke or phrase then go right ahead, but if it could easily be exchanged for a less provocative word and be equally as successful that is the route to go.
Introduce Her
This is such a big thing for me since I am an introvert, my sister has told me she likes to introduce herself since she is an extrovert but I love it! I think it is so great when a man introduces you to his friends, family, or co-workers with pride and confidence.
Dressing Up
I realize that basketball shorts and your t-shirt from high school is probably really comfortable and your personal uniform, but by throwing on a nice shirt and a pair of khakis you show a lady that you mean business and you aren't playing around. Dressing up doesn't always mean coat and tie, but it never hurts to have. Just make sure to communicate with her that the attire is dressy not casual.
*SIDE NOTE - THIS INCLUDES HYGENE! Please be clean and pleasant smelling when in the presence of ladies. It's courteous to you and all those around you.
Giving Her Your Coat
This goes a long with the above it because of you are dressed for success with a jacket or sports coat you are already prepared for when she gets cold later in the evening.
Open the Door for Her
Heck, open all the doors: car doors, doors on buildings, just not her house or apartment door. That is overstepping your welcome and can make her feel uncomfortable.
*PRO TIP - if she seems comfortable with it place your hand on the small of her back to guide her through the door. It's a comforting gesture.
Walk Her To Her Door
I'm closing with this one because in an ideal situation this is how you will close your dates from now on. Of course, a lady is perfectly capable of making it to her door on her own, but you should escort her just to be a gentleman. It's just kind.
